Hotdogs Are All

| USA | Children, Food & Drink

(I’m mentoring a little kid at our town’s elementary school. On the first day we meet our kids, we are supposed to ask a few questions about what they like. The kid I’m mentoring is around five years old.)

Me: “So what kinds of things do you like?”

Kid: “I like hotdogs…”

Me: “Anything else?”

Kid: “Nope, just hotdogs.”

They Have You Covered

| Singapore | Cheaters, Extra Stupid

(While in the midst of an internship search, we receive an email from our lecturer detailing advice about sending cover letters. Most of the advice is pretty standard, such as “Proof-read your cover letters” and “Do not apply for multiple disciplines”. Until the last one:)

Email: “And at the very least, if you’re going to copy someone else’s cover letter, please remember to change the contact details.”

Gaia Isn’t A Jewish Name Anyway

| VA, USA | Language & Words

(I am a world history teacher for incoming freshman at a local high school. I love my job, and encourage my students to speak and make jokes as we learn.)

Me: *explains about the Romans conquering the Mediterranean* “Has anyone circumnavigated the globe at this point? Remember, this is still BC!”

Student: “No one has circumcised the globe yet!”

Going Backwards On That Statement

| Cupertino, CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Non-Dialogue

I attended a highly-rated automotive vocational program — it has one of the highest placement rates on campus, even at a community college with better numbers than average. There are two tracks, part-time night classes and full-time day classes, and there are generally about three applicants for every spot available in the full-time track with previous educational and/or work experience required for admission. One of the teachers, as many teachers do, would tell students on the first day that they if they had any questions they should ask because ‘There’s no such thing as a stupid question.’

By the time I took his class, he changed to telling people he USED to say that, until someone proved him wrong. On his first day teaching one of the full-time program classes, when he said it a student’s hand shot up, and he called on them. The student asked ‘Why is it when you watch a video of a car driving down the freeway, the car is moving forward but the wheels are turning BACKWARD?’

The teacher is now forced to admit that there is, in fact, such thing as a stupid question.

And They’re All A Bunch Of Slytheryns

| CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Politics

(We were learning about the checks and balances system in the US Government, and about Congress and the House of Representatives.)

Teacher: “Okay, and questions about the House or Congress?”

Student: *not exactly the brightest bulb in the box* “So, like, do the Representatives all live in the same house?”