Not The Top Ice-Pick Of The Bunch

| TX, USA | Bizarre/Silly, History, Students

(My AP World History teacher is known for his sarcastic sense of humor and telling us stories related to what we’re learning. On this day, the lesson is on how Russia became the USSR, which is something the people not taking the AP level of the course also learn. My teacher tells us what happened when he told the only class he taught that was not AP one of the stories related to the unit.)

Teacher: “Trotsky was exiled from Russia once Stalin came to power, so he was just trotting around Mexico mumbling ‘I was the smartest man in the world… and now I live in Mexico.’ He was soon assassinated with an ice pick.”

Student: “Really? Cool! Then the ice pick could melt and there would be no evidence on who killed him!”

Teacher: “…”


Exercise For A Different Type Of Person

| BC, Canada | Exams/Tests, Technology

(I’m in my late forties and taking an evening class to upgrade my computer skills. I don’t know much about computers at this point, but have spent most of my working life in clerical jobs and am a very fast and accurate typist. Most of my fellow students are much younger.)

Teacher: “Okay, class. Now we’re going to do a timed keyboarding exercise. Go to [Site]. Ready? Start.”

(I start clicking away at my usual 100+ words per minute. After a bit, I sense the teacher standing behind me.)

Teacher: “Will you cut that out! You’re demoralizing the rest of the class.”


Mimosas Actually Cause Less Articulation

| West Springfield, MA, USA | Food & Drink, Health & Body

(It’s a mammal biology class and we have the smartest kid in the entire school. One day we’re going over features of the skull.)

Teacher: “So, what area does the jaw articulate with?

(The answer is the squamosal, but no one knows so we all look at Mr. Smarty Pants.)

Smart Kid: *with the utmost confidence* “The mimosa, obviously!”

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