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Not A Live Thing To Say

| KS, USA | Bad Behavior

(I am in seventh grade. Girl #1 is trying to start a rumor about me.)

Girl #2: “Hey, [My Name], do you really have lice?”

Me: “Yep. I got them from [Girl #1].”

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There And Back Again And Again And Again

| CA, USA | Books & Reading, Homework

(I’m in seventh grade and we’re starting to read The Hobbit in my English class. Despite my initial uncertainty (what the hell is a Hobbit?!) I wind up completely enamored with the book and read it four times in two weeks. Every day, we go over the assigned chapter.)

Teacher: “[My Name], stop raising your hand. I already know that you know the answer. For heaven’s sake, let someone else try.”

Me: “Awww…”

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Your Naivety Is Touching

| Cincinnati, OH, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(My ninth-grade science teacher is a bit of a hippie, as well as a 42-year-old single southern man with a very thick accent, living in a northern state, making him very clueless sometimes. Two boys are messing around in class.)

Teacher: “Boys, stop touching each other!”

(Everyone is trying not to laugh, but we end up silently giggling to ourselves. My teacher doesn’t understand what’s wrong with what he said, and is clearly confused as to why we are laughing.)

Boy #1: *laughing* “Sorry, [Teacher].”

Teacher: “It’s okay. You can touch each other later!”