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  • Multiple Class Syndrome
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    Blowing Advertising Wide Open

    | Australia | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (We’re in a business law lecture, and our instructor is explaining false advertising.)

    Instructor: “Of course, most ads are not intended to be taken literally, so people can’t take legal action when the product doesn’t deliver what was ‘promised.’ Let’s look at this one, for example.”

    (He shows us a very old cigarette advertisement with the tag line ‘blow in her face and she’ll follow you anywhere.’)

    Instructor: “So, we have this ad: “Blow in her face and she’ll blow in yours.”

    (The whole class lost it, and the instructor was so embarrassed his assistant had to take over.)

    Monkey-like Behavior

    | Houston, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Students, Transportation

    (My younger brother and I ride the morning bus at six am, and many of the students try to get a little extra sleep on the bus. This particular morning, one of the students has brought a ‘screaming monkey’ toy and is making it scream over and over again. He is ignoring protests to make it stop)

    Me: *to a friend* “If that kid makes that thing scream one more time, I’m gonna go over there and throw it out the window…”

    (My brother then stands up, walks over to the offending student, grabs the toy out of his hand, slaps him across the face with it, and hands it back to him.)

    Brother: “Don’t do that again.”

    Rest Of The Bus: *applauds*

    Practically Intelligent

    | Falkenberg, Sweden | Bad Behavior, Teachers

    (I’m 17 years old and attending a practical program aimed towards handling food and baked goods. There is a saying that students attending the practical programs do it because they are less smart and lazier than those attending the theoretical programs. I’m in a mandatory performance meeting with the teacher responsible for my program. We talk about school and the teacher is looking over my grades looking surprised.)

    Teacher: “Why are you attending this program?! You are INTELLIGENT!”

    Living In A Very Protective Neighborhood

    | Canada | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

    (I’m about five years old and we are sharing what we will be doing on the weekend.)

    Teacher: “And [My Name], what are you doing this weekend?”

    Me: “I’m going to visit my cousin! She lives in a condom!”

    (I had mixed up condo with condom.)

    Give Them A Second Chance To Answer

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Awesome, Students

    (It’s the last week of school, so in my paramedical biology class, we have decided to do brain-teasers instead of work.)

    Teacher: “Okay, last one. How many seconds are there in a year?”

    Me: “A million something?”

    Student #1: “525,600!”

    Student #2: “60!”

    My Friend: “Zero!”

    Teacher: “Hmm. Why do you say that?”

    My Friend: “Because you don’t get second chances in life.”


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