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    Needs A Replacement Replacement Plan

    | WI, USA | Family & Kids, Teachers

    (I walk past one of my professors, who is showing a student how he wants some packets put together for him for recruitment purposes. I also have a sibling who is a high school senior.)

    Me: “Hello, [Professor]. What are you working on?”

    Professor: “Working on replacing you two.”

    Me: “I’ve already replaced myself. I have a sibling coming here next year.”

    Bird Is The Word But Steve Is The Name

    | Miami, FL, USA | Field Trip, Pets & Animals

    (Two professors, a handful of other students, and I are heading out of the country for a research trip but get stuck in Florida for a couple days because we miss our flight, so we pass time by going to the Everglades. One of the professors likes to bird watch and is telling us the different species of birds we see.)

    Professor: *spotting a bird he doesn’t recognize* “I don’t know what to call him.”

    Me: “We could call him Steve. Steve’s a nice name.”

    A Testing Set Of Circumstances

    | NE, USA | Cheaters, Exams/Tests

    (I’m normally placed in advanced classes when it comes to English as it is my best subject; however, due to an error in my schedule I have been placed in normal English this year. This causes a girl next to me to quickly notice my grades on our tests and begin copying me. Today, however, she only has a pen to take the test, a test worth 65% of this unit’s grade. I have my pencil and proceed with the test. Sure enough, she copies every answer then rushes to hand hers in first.)

    Me: *seeing her hand in the test, I take out an eraser, promptly removing ALL of my answers*

    Girl: “What are you doing?”

    Me: *begins writing down completely different answers*

    Girl: “What are you doing?!”

    Me: *stands up and goes to the teacher, handing in the correct answers*

    Girl: “You b****! I’m going to fail!”

    (Needless to say she did in fact fail the test and stopped copying off of me. Though she was soon discovered copying off of someone else. She now takes all her tests in private.)

    Putting A (Ro)Dent In Your Class

    | England, UK | Bizarre/Silly, Pets & Animals

    (Sitting in the classroom during the last period of the day waiting for the register to be taken:)

    Girl: *screams loudly and throws bag across room*

    Teacher: “[Girl]! What the h*** was that about!?”

    Girl: “I was just looking through my bag for the textbook and I think I found a mouse!”

    Teacher: “WHAT!?”

    (The teacher went over to bag and looked inside. There was a live mouse in the bag which we all later found out had crawled in there during the night. This girl had spent an entire day with a mouse in her bag and not noticed!)

    A Class Deflection

    | Australia | Language & Words, Teachers

    (We have this one math teacher who has just started teaching us. Based on our first impressions of him, we get the feel that overall, he’s relatively serious, until this happens.)

    Student #1: “[Teacher], do you have a favorite class?”

    Teacher: “[Student #1], I don’t play favorites with classes or students.”

    Student #2: “Come on, [Teacher]. We all know that deep down, you must have a favorite.”

    (This goes on for a few more minutes, between the teacher and these two students.)

    Teacher: “Do you really want to know?”

    Students #1 & #2: “Yes!”

    Teacher: “Well, I can honestly say, that out of all the classes I’ve taught here, you guys are one of them.”

    (It took those two a while to catch on.)


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