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    Category: Teachers

    Lesson At No Risk Of Failing

    | The Netherlands | Awesome, Bizarre/Silly, Teachers, Technology

    (I’m studying for music tech. Our live sound teacher can be quite unusual in his teaching methods.)

    Teacher: “To show you what a proximity effect on a glass surface does to your microphone, I will now present, circus [Teacher]!”

    (He proceeds to grab a spinning desk chair, climbs on it, while handling a +€300  microphone, and puts it next to a high placed window while talking in the mic.)

    Teacher: “So as you can hear, the sound becomes distorted. Also, do NOT try this at home. Some of my colleagues would kick my ass if they saw me putting such an expensive piece of equipment at risk.”

    Me: “Sir, then why are you standing on a SPINNING desk chair?”

    Teacher: *climbs down* “Well, you wouldn’t pay this much attention if it wasn’t risky, wouldn’t you?”

    (He had a point…)

    It All Equates To Tears

    | UK | Math & Science, Teachers

    (My teacher is talking the class through an equation.)

    Teacher: “Okay, so now what do we do?”

    Student: *without missing a beat* “Cry.”

    Makes You Want To Cursive

    | MA, USA | Language & Words, Teachers

    (My professor is attempting to draw a cursive “I” on the whiteboard, getting more frustrated as he can’t remember what it looks like.)

    Professor: *tries to draw an ‘I’*

    Me: “That’s the number nine.”

    Professor: *frustrated, draws again*

    Me: “That’s a cursive ‘D.'”

    Professor: *angrily giving up*

    Me: “That that’s a treble clef!”

    The Force That Makes You Flee From Bugs

    | Brooklyn, NY, USA | Awesome, Language & Words, Math & Science, Teachers

    (I am taking physics and biochemistry this semester. The professor is explaining to the class how centrifugal force really doesn’t exist.)

    Physics Professor: “‘Centrifugal’ means ‘fleeing the center’. If this really existed, then if you tie a weight on a string, whirl it around in a circle and let go, the weight would make a sharp right turn and fly off radially from the circle. Instead, what it does is continue in a straight line, tangentially to the circle. This is called ‘centriPETal force,’ meaning ‘attracted to the center.'”

    Me: “Yeah, but what about that machine upstairs in the bio-chem lab that I use to concentrate my samples? Everyone calls it a centrifuge, right? What am I supposed to call it instead, a centripete?”

    Physics Professor: *without blinking an eye* “Only if it has a hundred legs.”

    Show A Bit Of Bloody Compassion

    | TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Exams/Tests, Health & Body, Teachers

    (We’re sitting in Typography class waiting for a quiz to start when a girl walks in holding her hand.)

    Student: “Um, siiiir?”

    (She holds up her arm and blood is gushing out of her palm.)

    Student: “I need some help bandaging this up.”

    (The professor makes no movement to help so another student rushes up.)

    Professor: “Our quiz is about to start. This is your only chance to take it.”

    Student #2: “She needs stitches and has to go to the hospital!”

    Professor: “Well, she can go after or forfeit a grade.”

    Student #3: “There’s a first aid kit in the main hallway.”

    (The three students leave.)

    Professor: “Well, they’re all receiving a zero.”

    (He then proceeded to leave the room after them. After 10 minutes we peeked our heads outside and there was a TRAIL of blood on the floor. Turned out the professor stood there watching them patch her hand until they left to take her to the hospital to get stitches. He really did fail them!)

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