• First Grade Problems
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  • November Theme Of The Month: Horrible Histories!

    Category: Teachers

    Makes You Want To Curse(ive)

    | Broussard, LA, USA | Books & Reading, Crazy Requests, Teachers

    (I’ve loved to read and write since I learned how. When I was in first grade, I found a book that taught me how to write in cursive, which was a third-grade subject. At the beginning of my third grade year, I want the teacher to know what I can do. On a test, I proudly write my name in cursive. When my teacher hands back the text, she’s written in red pen:)

    Teacher: “Good job, but write in print next time!”

    (She sees me frowning and leans down to explain.)

    Teacher: “It’s not fair that you’ve learned something no one else has, [My Name]. Everyone else will catch up in a few months, but until then, I want you to stick to print, okay?”

    (I had knowledge no one else did, and instead of encouraging me, my teacher told me to hide it.)

    I Have A Sinking Feeling About This

    | UK | Sports, Teachers

    (After a full term of swimming lessons, my four-year-old daughter’s teacher wants to meet me and give a report on my daughter’s progress.)

    Teacher: “Your daughter never listens to my instructions.”

    Me: “Really? That’s very unusual behaviour for her.”

    Teacher: “Yes, I call [Another Name] and she looks but doesn’t respond.”

    Me: “That’s because [Another Name] is not her name.”

    (But it was her older sister’s name, which is why she took notice.)

    Try Again, Says ‘I’

    | DE, USA | Language & Words, Teachers

    (One of my second-grade students is writing a lowercase ‘l’ on her iPad screen. She’s having trouble making the line straight, so she’s marked up and down a few times until she accidentally crosses the ‘l.’)

    Me: “[Student], rewrite that last letter and make it look less like a ‘t.'”

    Student: “Yeah. Sorry. It started out as an ‘l,’ but then it just got out of hand.”

    Not The ‘B’ Grade You Wanted

    | MA, USA | Awesome, Homework, Language & Words, Teachers

    (My 11th grade English teacher was one term from retirement and thus knew he could get away with quite a bit in class…)

    Teacher: “All right, hand in your assignments.”

    Me: *hands in a well-thought-out three-page assignment*

    Student: *hands in a phoned-in assignment that takes up a fraction of a page*

    Teacher: *walks over to Student and writes BS on his paper* “‘BS.’ That stands for ‘Badly Stated.’”

    Doesn’t Take Much To Crack His Code

    MA, USA | Books & Reading, History, Teachers

    (The professor for this class is a former archeologist specializing in temples and other religious sites. He is typically a very sweet, easy-going man.)

    Student: “Professor, what do you think of the recent documentary that talks about finding Jesus’ tomb?”

    Professor: “The one directed by [Director]?”

    Student: “Yes, that one.”

    Professor: “Let’s just say if [Director] was crossing the street in front of my car, I wouldn’t slow down.”

    (He pauses for a moment, and then graces us with a gleeful smile.)

    Professor: “If [Director] and [Popular Author of action/mystery novels that take great liberties with religious history] were crossing the street together… I’d speed up.”

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