The Nohawk

| Houma, LA, USA | Bizarre/Silly

Fourth Grader: “Mr. [My Name], I’m not saying you’re old, but why do old men shave just the middle part of their heads?”

Me: “Oh it’s a very popular style with older men. It’s called a reverse Mohawk.”


Demands No Disorder In Class

| Fort Polk, LA, USA | Bad Behavior, Teachers

(This takes place when I’m six-years-old in first grade. I have a learning disability called ADHD, or attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, which makes it next to impossible for me to pay attention or sit still for long periods of time without something for me to do. I have a teacher who has children with ADHD, so he can help me. But one day he’s not in; instead, a substitute teacher on this day is in.)

Me: *starts tapping foot*

Substitute: “[My Name]! Stop it!”

(I immediately stop, scared about what my parents would do if I got in trouble. I then start to play with my necklace.)

Substitute: “[My Name]! If you keep distracting the other students like that, I will keep you inside for recess!”

(Getting scared, I again stop, but am kept inside for recess when I accidentally move my desk trying to get up. For those that don’t know, keeping a child with ADHD inside from recess is a horrible idea, since it builds up unreleased energy. The substitute then asks for some of my classmates to pass out rubber ducks for science.)

Girl: *sitting next to me* “Hey, [My Name], can you pass out the rubber duckies for me. My feet hurt from running.”

Me: “Okay.” *runs up to grab some ducks*

Substitute: “[My Name], what are you, an idiot? I didn’t call you. Go stand in the corner.”

(I spent the rest of the day in the corner. When I got home crying. My mom was worried, until I told her what happened. She was absolutely livid, and called the school. I learned later that he was that way towards me because he believed children with ADHD were just undisciplined by their parents, so he tried to “discipline” the ADHD out of me.)


Wish The Teacher Would Just Cocoon Himself

| USA | Bad Behavior, Pets & Animals, Teachers

(I take my second graders outside to gather leaves and flowers for pressing into their books. One of my students finds a large caterpillar munching on leaves. My students gather around, and I explain to them how caterpillars turn into butterflies. Another (very grumpy) teacher happens to pass by.)

Students: “[Teacher #2], [Teacher #2], look at the caterpillar! It’s going to turn into a butterfly!”

Teacher #2: “Oh, it is not. Stop telling lies.”

Me: “What?!”

Students: “Yes, it is! Ms. [My Name] said so!”

One Student: “And I read it in my book!”

Teacher #2: “Well, where’s the butterfly? Inside that ugly thing? You shouldn’t be teaching these kids lies.” *slouches off*

(Words fail me.)


That’s A Whole Lot Of ‘Wrong’

| UAE, Abu Dhabi | Bizarre/Silly, Exams/Tests

(My teacher is checking our quizzes and I got a perfect score. I check my quiz and count my score and count the problems. I see that my score is 11 and there were 12 problems. I approach my teacher.)

Me: “Miss, my score is 11 but there are 12 questions here, so can you fix it?”

Teacher: “Okay, one sec…”

(The teacher gives me one wrong on problem #12.)

Me: “Miss, why do I have one wrong if I got perfect?”

Teacher: “I probably checked it wrong.”

Me: “But I got correct on problem #12; I even checked with [Classmate].”

(The teacher calls my classmate and gives him a ‘wrong,’ too.)

Teacher: “There.”

(The bell rings and the teacher leaves.)

Classmate: “What the f*** dude?”

Me: *stands confused and speechless*


You’re Just Adding To The Problem

| NS, Canada | Bad Behavior, Math & Science, Teachers

(Within the first couple months of my grade three year, I come down with a bad case of chickenpox, with strep throat on top of it. While my teacher sends out booklets for me to work on during the week-and-a-half or so I am out of school, I am still a bit behind. On my first day back, I find out that my class had started on multiplication. I’m not understanding anything that’s on my worksheet, so I go to the teacher.)

Me: “Miss, how do I do this?”

Teacher: “Oh, it’s just like addition.”

Me: “Then why is it different?”

Teacher: “Oh, you’ll figure it out.” *walks away*

(I went back to my desk and started work in my paper. I treated every question like it was addition, and of course got all of them wrong. It wasn’t until a class almost a week later that I got it better explained to me, and I was given a times table sheet that I was supposed to have gotten along with the booklets and should have had partially memorized by then. By then, the damage had already been done, and I’ve struggled with math since then.)

Page 1/4612345...Last