(I’m in my Algebra 2 class, which I share with a lot of snarky but good-natured people. The teacher also likes to tell stories about herself that are relevant to what we’re studying; in this case, she’s talking about sales models.)
Teacher: “So, when I was in business school, which was a while back, but not THAT far back–”
(One of my classmates promptly starts dancing the Egyptian in his seat. Everyone, especially the now embarrassed teacher, bursts out laughing.)
(I go to an all-girls boarding school, where most of the students wear very dressy outfits. Just before a formal dinner for the senior class, my roommate notices my clothing choice: a simple t-shirt dress and leggings.)
Roommate: “(My name) – NO. You can’t wear that!”
Me: “But its practical, accordig to dress code, and i like it. Seems fine to me.”
Roommate: “But you’ll look like a… a nerd.”
(I glance around at my collection of classic novels and books on astonomy, the knitted sweaters in my laundry pile, and the huge amount of school supplies on my desk.)
Me: “You know, somehow I think that my dress is probably the least of my worries when it comes to the nerd alert…”
(I wore the dress and leggings, and with much pride.)
(A few students in my form thought that our former R.S teacher and our form tutor would make a good couple and in R.S lessons, they would frequently tease the teacher about it (for example they would combine the surnames of the two teachers and write it on the whiteboard). This event takes place on a Monday morning, around two years after [R.S teacher] has left the school.)
[Student #1]: So Miss, what did you do at the weekend?
[Form tutor]: Well, on Saturday I went to the pub and on Sunday, I went to a friend’s house and ended up falling asleep!
[Student #2]: (Seeing the opportunity) Miss? You know how you said you went to a ‘friend’s house’? Was that friend, by any chance, [R.S teacher]?
(After that, the whole class, including our form tutor, burst into laughter; Much to the dismay of [Student #1] and [Student #2], the friend wasn’t the R.S teacher.)
(I’m a practising Wiccan and have been since I was about 12 years old. This caused quite a stir in school amongst people who had never heard of it but all the students were respectfully curious and as a result I was happy to answer their questions, sadly the teachers weren’t so understanding. I was called into an after-school meeting with the head of year, head of lower school, and head of R.E. to answer their questions)
Head of year: We’re just concerned that you don’t know what you’re getting into. We did some research and I phoned up a practitioner in the yellow pages and what they had to say was quite frankly terrifying. You can see here (holding out a book review from a FICTION series about a girl finding Wicca and it being a lot of naked spell-work, penis shaped candles and actual magical battles).
Me: With all due respect, you’d never heard of this before I brought it to your attention as a minority religion in class, I’ve been open about it the whole time and there have been no secrets. When I first discovered Wicca, I got my research from multiple sources online rather than a fantasy series and phoning some random whackjob. Mum did her research as well with the same concerns you had before deciding her concerns were unfounded. Wicca isn’t about devil-worship or black magic, it’s about respect for nature and working with the natural energies in the universe, doing no harm to others. This is one of those ‘dread spell books’…(shows her my actual ‘spells for teenage witches’ with study spells, friendship spells, good nights sleep spell, good hair potions- natural ingredients you can use as conditioner.)
Head of R.E. *snatches it from me*: This is exactly what we’re talking about! You can see this cover is clearly very intimidating!
(the front cover was swirling orange and yellow with glittery purple writing.)
Me: I don’t know about you but I don’t usually find cheerful colours and lava-lamp patterns to be intimidating. A 12 year old having an after-school meeting in an empty school with THREE adults however…
(They very quickly let me go after that and it was never spoken of again except for a letter home to my parents requesting to see them, claiming I’d sacrificed a hedgehog on the school field. In reality I found an already dead hedgehog and moved it under the hedge before the little kids got freaked out or someone tried to mess with it. Mum laughed in their faces and called them out on their b***s***, even if it had been true the choice of the word ‘sacrificed’ rather than simply ‘killed’ just went to show how prejudiced and intolerant they were.)
(My older brother didn’t talk at school very much when he was little, and he doesn’t really talk all that much when my friends are around, and so one of my best friends knows him for being really silent, during our first week of middle school, my best friend and I are talking, and the subject of my brother’s silence comes up)
Me: “You know [Brother] got in trouble for talking last year.”
Friend: “No! [Brother] never talks!”
Me: “I’m serious! He literally had move spots in Design because he couldn’t stop talking!”
Friend: “No way! I’ve only heard him talk like twice in my life!”
Me: “He talks a lot more at home.”
Friend: “No he does not! I have been to your house numerous times, and he never talks!”
Me: “Literally, ask you can ask my mom about this, and she’ll agree with me!”
(Needless to say, my best friend still doesn’t believe it, even after seeing him talk a lot more)