Category: Teachers

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Better Sasquatch What He’s Saying

| CA, USA | Awesome, Bizarre/Silly, Teachers

(I attend a very small college. Consequently the classes tend to have around 14-20 students in them, so lack of participation shows. Recent recruiting has brought in some students who aren’t the greatest. I’m in a U.S. history class with a professor who often goes off topic just to mess with the students who aren’t listening or don’t do the reading. One such instance:)

Professor: “So, as you all know, Bigfoot was responsible for the exploration of the new world.”

Me: “What if someone puts that on their paper?”

Professor: “Actually, that’s happened.”

(One of the students in the back ducked behind their backpack sheepishly.)

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Well, That’s THAT Lesson Down The Tubes

| Denver, CO, USA | Awesome, Teachers, Technology

(We’re in a technology class. While messing around, I figure out how to unblock YouTube from the school’s network.)

Teacher: “Holy crap, you unblocked it?”

Me: “Um… yeah… Am I in trouble?”

Teacher: *rushes to computer* “Heck, naw! Hey, who wants to watch [YouTuber]?”

(Apparently every year they up the security on YouTube, and the teacher was amazed ANYONE got past it this time.)

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You’re Just Adding To The Problem

| NS, Canada | Bad Behavior, Math & Science, Teachers

(Within the first couple months of my grade three year, I come down with a bad case of chickenpox, with strep throat on top of it. While my teacher sends out booklets for me to work on during the week-and-a-half or so I am out of school, I am still a bit behind. On my first day back, I find out that my class had started on multiplication. I’m not understanding anything that’s on my worksheet, so I go to the teacher.)

Me: “Miss, how do I do this?”

Teacher: “Oh, it’s just like addition.”

Me: “Then why is it different?”

Teacher: “Oh, you’ll figure it out.” *walks away*

(I went back to my desk and started work in my paper. I treated every question like it was addition, and of course got all of them wrong. It wasn’t until a class almost a week later that I got it better explained to me, and I was given a times table sheet that I was supposed to have gotten along with the booklets and should have had partially memorized by then. By then, the damage had already been done, and I’ve struggled with math since then.)

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Reaching For The Best Teaching

| Bury, England, UK | Awesome, Teachers

(It’s the first day of a new year and we’re waiting in our classroom to meet our new form tutor, who we’ve been told is running late. Five minutes after the bell has gone, a young looking teacher walks into the classroom with a furious look on his face. His eyes stop on me.)

Teacher: “[My Name]?”

Me: “Yes?”

Teacher: *points out the door into the hallway* “Now.”

(He turns around and strides out into the corridor. I follow him out wondering what I’ve done wrong to make him so angry as I’ve never been in trouble before. He closes the door behind me, then turns to look at me, all traces of anger completely gone.)

Teacher: “Sorry about the scowl; I need to build a rep. I’ve heard you’re the star pupil of my class.”

Me: “Um… I guess…”

Teacher: *now grinning widely* “And humble, too. I like it. Listen, [Teacher #2] came up to me earlier complaining about you getting in his way by using the crossing before school, and asked me to talk to you about road safety. You must have had right of way seeing as it’s a zebra crossing, but if anyone asks I was really strict and scary while telling you off, okay?”

Me: “I… uh… okay?”

Teacher: “Perfect. I’m sure we’re going to get along famously.”

(With that, the scowl came back and he walked back into the classroom. I followed him back in looking confused and worried as he started talking to the class.)

Teacher: “Right, I’ve been told you’re the worst class in the school.” *we’re definitely not* “So rest assured I’m gonna whip you into shape. I don’t tolerate lateness, interruptions, fighting, excuses, or Crocs. You may refer to me as ‘Sir,’ ‘Mr [Teacher],’ or ‘My Liege.’ Are we clear?”

Class: “Yes, sir.”

Teacher: “Good. Now, the lesson plan I’ve been given for this introduction is really boring, but it’s also meant to take another hour and 50 minutes, so let’s go to the playground and do interesting things instead.”

(We spent the rest of the lesson standing in lines doing one minute interviews of each other, playing word games, sharing interesting stories from the summer with the class, and generally bonding as a class. Apparently the other classes had to fill in a worksheet about themselves and present it to everyone, which they didn’t have anywhere near as much fun doing.)

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Any Day Is Lightened By Puns

| Elnora, IN, USA | Punny, Teachers

(One of the classroom lights does not come on.)

Teacher: “Everyone raise your hands!”

(All the students do so.)

Teacher: “That’s odd. I thought ‘Many hands make light work.’”

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