Category: Rude & Risque

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Gives New Meaning To R&D

| Brisbane, QLD, Australia | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(In maths class, I and some of my friends are talking off-topic as we find the workload much too difficult.)

Friend #1: “Can you guys roll your ‘R’s?”

Friend #2: “Nah, never tried.”

Me: “Yeah, it’s really easy.” *I say, rolling the ‘R’*

(Friend #1 then spends sometime finding out what other letters he can roll on his tongue.)

Friend #1: “Oh! I can roll my ‘D’s in my mouth, too!”

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Exponentially Embarrassing

| USA | Rude & Risque, Students

(My friend and I are discussing an advanced math class I take.)

Me: “It’s a difficult class, but the good news is the teacher has really big curves.”

(I blushed while my friend burst out laughing. I meant to say the teacher curves the tests!)

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Play ‘Back’ What You Said

| NM, USA | Rude & Risque, Sports

(Our health teacher is pretty laid back and jokes around a lot. The student he is talking to isn’t the smartest and is a little bit on the heavy side, but is comfortable joking about it. The teacher also is helping the student get in shape.)

Student: “Whatever, Mr. [Teacher]. I could take you down if we ever wrestled again.”

Teacher: “I would just have to tackle you and you wouldn’t be able to get up.”

Class: *chuckles*

Student: “It’s okay if you tackle me; I’m good on my back.”

Class: *erupts with laughter*

Student #2: *after he finishes laughing* “Wait, what’s so funny? I didn’t get it.”

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Your Naivety Is Touching

| Cincinnati, OH, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(My ninth-grade science teacher is a bit of a hippie, as well as a 42-year-old single southern man with a very thick accent, living in a northern state, making him very clueless sometimes. Two boys are messing around in class.)

Teacher: “Boys, stop touching each other!”

(Everyone is trying not to laugh, but we end up silently giggling to ourselves. My teacher doesn’t understand what’s wrong with what he said, and is clearly confused as to why we are laughing.)

Boy #1: *laughing* “Sorry, [Teacher].”

Teacher: “It’s okay. You can touch each other later!”

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A Different Kind Of Shaq Attack

| Colorado Springs, CO, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque

(We are in Spanish class and my substitute teacher is going around tossing a ball to students and telling them to describe a famous person.)

Teacher: *tossing it to Student #1 who sits next to me* “Shaquille O’neal es…?” *Shaquille O’neal is…?*

Student #1: “Shaquille O’neal es… Uh how do you say rich?”

Teacher: “Well, I know rica means rich as in tasty meat.” *goes to Google it*

Me: *quitely so no one else can hear* “Shaquille O’neal had tasty meat.”

Student #1: *turns to me* “You’re a bad person.”

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