Category: Math & Science

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The Sky Is The Limit Of What Mother Will Tolerate

| Allentown, PA, USA | Math & Science, Parents, Teachers

(This conversation happens in my seventh-grade science class.)

Teacher: “The sky has no limit, therefore it is impossible to see the end of it.”

Classmate: “That’s not true! I’ve seen the end of the sky!”

Teacher: “No you haven’t, because it’s physically impossible.”

Classmate: “Yes, I have!”

Teacher: “Oh, really? So if I called your mom right now and told her that you saw the end of the sky, what do you think she would say?”

Classmate: “Probably something along the lines of, ‘Why the h*** are you calling me at work for that?’”

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Math So Hard It Can Break You

| NY, USA | Health & Body, Math & Science

(I rather impressively snapped my arm in half in gym class, so badly that it looked like I had an extra elbow. It looked incredibly scary and ended up being the talk of the school, but it was a clean break and the hospital was able to fix it perfectly. I was in a cast for the next few months, during which this happens:)

Math Teacher: “Every year I talk about a stick for this question, but given recent events… If you broke [My Name]’s arm into three randomly-sized pieces, what is the probability that they can form a triangle?”

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That Learning Method Is Certainly Divisive

| NY, USA | Language & Words, Math & Science, Rude & Risque

(We are learning how to find out if a number Is divisible by another number. For instance, if a number is even, it is divisible by two. In this particular instance, we are learning the trick for 3’s. If a number’s digits add up to a number divisible by 3, then it too is divisible by three. For instance, 225. 2+2+5=9 and 9/3=3. Therefore, the following happens.)

Teacher: “To remember the trick for threes, just remember: threesome! Threesome! Threesome!”

(Of course, nobody understood the implication at the time, but I still wonder if she was doing it intentionally or just out of naïveté.)

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That Is Statistically True

| Oshkosh, WI, USA | Math & Science

(I overheard this little gem while manning a booth in the student union.)

Student: “Stats isn’t math. It’s like, not math.”

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Got It Half Right

| Long Island, NY, USA | Math & Science

Teacher: “Who can tell me what 36 divided by 2 is?”

My Thought Process: “Well, twelve times 2 is 24, that leaves another twelve, which is equal to 6 times 2, so 36 divided by 2 is equal to twelve and six, and six is half of twelve…”

Me: “Twelve and a half!”

(I was actually confused for a moment when the teacher said that was wrong, but then another kid said 18 and I realized you had to ADD them. Cue the internal facepalm.)

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