Category: Family & Kids

Home Doesn’t Always Work

| Midlands, UK | Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Top

(I am a year 5 class teacher. I’m dismissing my class of nine and ten year olds at the end of the day when a mother approaches me.)

Mother: “My son’s not been doing his homework!”

Me: “I know. He hasn’t handed his homework in for several weeks now.”

Mother: “Well, I’m not very happy about this!”

Me: “No, nor am I.”

Mother: “So, what are you going to do about it?”

Me: “I can’t make him do his homework. His homework is to be completed at home.”

Mother: “Why?”

Light On The Brain Cells

| Willow Grove, PA, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Family & Kids

(I am working in the office supplies section in late July.)

Customer: “Excuse me, miss, do you have any more of these pencil boxes?”

Me: “Right over here.” *points*

Customer: “Great. I need 29 more. I’m a first grade teacher.”

Me: “That’s nice of you.”

Customer: “There’s only five left in the blue.”

Me: “I apologize, but we do have 20 black ones left. Except for the color, they are identical.”

Customer: “I can’t get black for first graders. It will scare them.”

Me: “Okay. Well, you can try the back to school area, but I doubt they’ll have more than one or two blue left. You’ll have to keep coming back throughout the summer to get 29 more in the blue.”

Customer: “Okay, thank you.” *scoots off to school section*

(Not 15 minutes later, the customer is back putting black cases in her cart.)

Me: “I see you decided to get the black ones after all; excellent choice.”

Customer: “I know. Now I have to cover them in stickers so the children won’t be scared!”

Music Is Ageless

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Family & Kids

(I am a 21-year-old receptionist at a music school. One evening, there is a student waiting for his lesson in the reception area.)

Me: “Hi there. How old are you?”

Student: “8 years old. How old are you?”

Me: *smiles* “How old do you think I am?”

Student: “I dunno. You look really old.”

*silence*

Student: “Yeah, you look like you’re like, 17 or something.”

No Proof In Purchase

| Wiltshire, England, UK | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Hotels & Lodging

(We have a school prom in our function room. Whenever we have a prom, we run a ‘dry’ bar. We will not serve the students at the main bar. One of the teachers approaches the bar and slams a bottle down on the counter.)

Teacher: “I just took this from one of my students. He is 16!”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s—”

Teacher: “This is a disgrace; you’ve broken the law. Who served him! Was it you?”

Me: “It’s a—”

Teacher: “I want to speak to your manager.”

Me: “I understand why you’re upset, but—”

Teacher: “We won’t have another prom here! Selling alcohol to kids—”

Me: “It’s a non alcoholic beer. There is no alcohol behind the bar tonight and no one here would serve anyone underage anyway.”

Teacher: “Oh, God. I’m so sorry. I’d better give this back to him.”