Category: Exams/Tests

A Hundred Reasons To Hate You

USA | Exams/Tests

(I take Honors Biology which most people say is the hardest class you can take freshman year. While I’m not top of my class, I’m not horrible at it. We just took a test on genetics when this happens.)

Teacher: “I graded your tests and you didn’t do that great. Regular biology got a curve since no one got one hundred, but only one student got one hundred in here so you don’t get a curve.”

Student #1: “Who got one hundred!?”

Student #2: “It’s probably [Smart Student].”

Teacher: “Actually it was [My Name].”

(Cue protests and hate from the entire class. Everyone hates me now.)

Half A Vicious Cycle

| Burnaby, BC, Canada | Exams/Tests

(My tutorial has just taken a short quiz on the book we read for class. We are currently going over the answers.)

Teacher’s Assistant: “And number three… a bicycle. You can have a half point if you wrote unicycle.”

Classmate: “If we wrote tricycle, can we get one-and-a-half?”

Teacher’s Assistant: “NO.”

Calculus Versus Dumbledore’s Army

| MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Exams/Tests, Teachers

Our calculus teacher is on maternity leave, and we have a substitute. We have our first exam since he took over. The entire class does poorly, with not a single student passing the exam. A few of us have formed a calculus study group and meet after school to try to figure out why all of our scores were so bad.

After comparing our answers, we find we were frequently coming up with the same answers, all marked wrong. Reviewing our tests, we can’t find where we had made errors, so we go to the school’s math tutor the next morning for help. She similarly can’t find where we had made errors.

She goes with us to the calculus substitute. He simply pulls out the master test from the textbook and says that the answers are supplied by the company and all that matters is that we were wrong. Finally the math tutor gets another teacher and they demand to see the master test.

It ends up that he had retyped the equations that were the questions off of the master test into our test. When he did so, he put in numerous typos: eliminating parentheses, negative signs, and factors. He copied the limits from one question onto another. A whole portion of one question was missing, and two questions were swapped. All in all, out of 50 questions, 38 were mistyped!

The tutor and teacher bring this up to the principal, who has our grades amended so that we get scores when correctly solving the equations as given. The class all goes from failing the exam to higher scores.

The substitute was dismissed and the math tutor took over the position. Not wanting to admit he made a mistake, the substitute wrote a ton of letters to the school board and local newspaper. He accused the students of cheating for higher scores and that we should have “understood the spirit if not the letter” of the equations he gave us. Furthermore he called for the school board to expel any student participating in a study group saying that they allowed us to coordinate attacks on teachers and how it would lead to gang activity!

They Were Just Testing You

| Limerick, Ireland | Exams/Tests

(One of the lecturers at our university likes to give two of his classes their midterms at the same time, in the same room. He has a system where there are ten different variations of the exam paper for each class, and we take them based on our student ID numbers. All of the papers have been handed out, and we’re about to start the exam when a student puts their hand up.)

Lecturer: “Yes?”

Student #1: “Sir, the paper says there are twenty questions on it, but there are only fourteen.”

Lecturer: “Ah, well have you tried looking at the other side of the sheet?”

Student #1: *sounding confused* “Yes? There’s nothing there.”

Lecturer: *suddenly looking worried and confused as well* “Wait… What?”

(At this point, about half the class checks their own papers and finds that every version of the exam is missing the other side. The lecturer checks some things and is visibly distressed at the situation. Eventually he figures out what went wrong – apparently, he forgot to tell the secretary that made the copies that he wanted both sides, and then didn’t think to check them until it was too late. The test is called off, and the marks we would have got from the exam are added to the marks we could get from our practical work in the labs. Before we go, he lets us know how it could have been worse.)

Lecturer: “At least we caught this early on. Last year, one kid took the wrong exam. Not the wrong numbered version, he took the exam for the class he wasn’t taking. I’m not sure how he didn’t notice.”

Cheated Out Of Her Punchline

| Edmonton, AB, Canada | Cheaters, Exams/Tests

(We’re doing an assignment in class where we’re required to work as groups; however, it’s being treated as a quiz so we have to keep our heads down and talk quietly in our groups. The quiet girl in our class has to leave early, so she’ll occasionally glance up at the clock, which is behind her. Sitting directly under the clock is a group of stereotypical ‘popular’ girls who constantly give the quiet girl a hard time. One of them keeps scoffing at her every time she looks at the clock, but the quiet girl ignores her. And yes, the teacher is aware the quiet girl has to leave early and is just looking at the clock.)

Quiet Girl: *glances back at clock*

Popular Girl: “Jeez, [Quiet Girl], stop f****** cheating off me!” *It’s obvious she’s just trying to give her a hard time, and hopefully get her in trouble*

Quiet Girl: *fed up with her* “Don’t worry, [Popular Girl], if I was going to cheat I definitely wouldn’t cheat off of you.”

(Popular Girl’s jaw dropped and her eyes bulged. The entire class slowly turned to look at them, and then proceeded to clap.)

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