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    Dunked Deep In History

    | MA, USA | Food & Drink, History, Students

    (I have returned to college to get a second degree and pursue a new career. I’m taking a world history class to satisfy some requirements. The professor is discussing the organization of pre-industrial towns in England.)

    Professor: “What was at the center of every English town?” *silence* “Come on, guys. What’s at the center of every New England town?”

    Girl: *hesitantly* “Dunkin’ Donuts?”

    Turned Out To Be A Very Happy Meal

    | USA | Bizarre/Silly, Sports, Students

    (One of my friends is sitting in the seat in front of mine. We’re doing classwork and the teacher grades it every time, which is 30% of our grade. Said friend and I split our classwork together, so he’s doing his share and is maybe one or two questions behind me.)

    Friend: “Ugh, I don’t want to do this!”

    (My friend goes up to the teacher and comments on an ugly plushy McDonald’s Happy Meal toy she has on her desk.)

    Friend: “This thing is so frickin’ ugly.”

    Teacher: “It’s not mine. Some student left it here.”

    Friend: “This thing is so ugly I just wanna throw it in the trashcan.”

    Teacher: “If you get it in the trashcan I’ll give you an 100 on your classwork.”

    (We’re maybe 12 feet away from the trashcan or more.)

    Friend: “OKAY! WHO BELIEVES IN ME?!”

    (The class is silent.)

    Teacher: “You’re not gonna make it.”

    (My friend shoots it and makes it perfectly in the trashcan. Everyone cheers and the teacher shrugs and puts in a 100. He comes back and is so happy I think he’s gonna pee himself.)

    Friend: “MY MOM IS GONNA BE SO PROUD OF ME!”

    Me: “Yes… the boy who can make an ugly McDonald’s toy in the trashcan for an 100. That should be an Olympic sport.”

    Friend: “I’M AN OLYMPIAN!!”

    (About 10 minutes later a kid comes in and gets the McDonald’s toy. We all laugh and the kid looks confused.)

    Inside I’m Not Laughing

    | VA, USA | Teachers

    (I and several of my friends are watching a video completely unrelated to world history, but our teacher doesn’t know that. She’s on the other side of the room.)

    Teacher: “Who is laughing? Stop laughing. I’m grumpy and I hate the sound of laughter when I’m grumpy.”

    A Degree Of Mastery

    | Elyria, OH, USA | Bizarre/Silly, Teachers

    (I was in my English class having a discussion with my English teacher about qualifications necessary to become a high school teacher like herself.)

    Teacher: “And right now I’m working on earning my Master’s Degree.” *in a devious voice* “Then you will all have to call me ‘Master Johnson.'”

    Me: “Thanks for the advice Bachelor J.”

    (I now continually refer to her as Bachelor Johnson.)

    Winter In The North


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