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    A Starter For Sex

    | USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque, Teachers

    (I’m in a first-year Latin class. Today, we are reviewing cardinal numbers in preparation for a test. She calls on a student to recite cardinal numbers one through ten.)

    Student: “Tres, quattor, quinque…”

    (He stops, unable to remember the Latin word for ‘six.’ My teacher decides to give him a prompt.)

    Teacher: “A young man’s favorite subject.”

    Student: “Oh, sex!”

    Copy Error

    | Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bizarre/Silly, Crazy Requests, Teachers

    (I am learning pattern making as part of a fashion course. Due to illness I had missed a day of class, along with a couple of other students. We are all adults.)

    Teacher: “Those students who missed last class have to sit down the back to complete the work done on that day.”

    (She gives us her work book to work from. She goes up the front and starts on the next lesson. I start quickly copying from her page, writing all the notes she has written, because I knew the work would take all lesson and I didn’t want to miss out on the current lesson. I intended on working the lesson at home.  The other students start doing the same. The teacher comes up to check on our progress.)

    Teacher: “How dare you just copy my work? That’s my work. You have to do it on your own!”

    Me: “You gave it to us to work off! I copied it so I can work on it at home and not miss today’s lesson and have to do the same thing tomorrow.”

    Teacher: “YOU COPIED MY WORK. IT’S NOTHING BUT COPYING. YOU DIDN’T DO THE WORK. I DID. IT’S NOT FAIR!”

    (I then headed back to my normal seat to copy the work that she had drawn on the board –  work she had copied straight from her work book page, word for word. Apparently if it was on the board it was learning not copying…)

    Rested Development

    | USA | Language & Words, Students

    (I am student teaching in a first grade class. My supervising teacher is reviewing vocabulary with the students.)

    Teacher: “The next word is ‘rested.’ Can anyone use ‘rested’ in a sentence?”

    Student: “He was arrested by the tree.”

    Teacher: *trying not to laugh* “Not exactly…”

    Drawing Comparisons

    | OK, USA | Art/Design, Students, Teachers

    (Science has always been one of my best subjects and I usually receive high marks. One day in biology, I am very bored and begin to draw during class. The teacher is walking up and down the rows of desks while he talks, when he suddenly SLAMS a yard stick on the desk behind a boy, startling him.)

    Teacher: “What are you doing, [Student]?”

    Student: “Uh, I was drawing?”

    Teacher: “Not in my class. Put it up.”

    (I begin to panic and go to put my drawing away before I get in trouble, too.)

    Student: “[My Name] is drawing, too! Why didn’t you yell at her?”

    Teacher: “[My Name] has a 93 in my class. The next highest score is [Student #2] with a 70. [My Name] can do anything she wants.”

    Making Your (Data) Point For You

    | Santa Cruz, CA, USA | Math & Science, Students, Teachers

    Teacher: “You can learn a lot from one data point. If I hire a babysitter, and she shows up ten minutes late, I won’t hire her again. Next time, she’ll be twenty minutes late, or her car will break down, or—”

    (A student walks in late. He doesn’t sit down, instead staring around the classroom.)

    Teacher: “You here for Econ?”

    (The student wordlessly walks back out.)

    Teacher: “I saw his confused expression. I had one data point!”


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