• A Very Long Engagement
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  • October's Theme Of The Month: Literally Illiterate!

    And The West Coast Requires AC

    | USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Students

    (I am in an Intro to Engineering class; it is the first day of school.)

    Teacher: *calls on student* “What is the difference between AC and DC?”

    Student: *not playing attention* “Huh? Uh… DC’s on the east coast?”

    Reality Shark-Bites

    | Doncaster, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Students

    (We are in geography class and we are talking about oceans. One of my classmates says something unexpected.)

    Classmate: *puts her hand up and our teacher calls on her* “Sir, are sharks real?”

    Teacher: “Excuse me?”

    Classmate: “Are sharks real? Because I have never seen one in real life.”

    Finding The Alco-loop-hole

    | Princeton, NJ, USA | Bad Behavior, Dorms, Food & Drink, Staff

    (It’s the first week of my freshman year, and I’m at a party with my RA and some of my hall-mates.)

    RA: “As your RA, I’m not allowed to give you any alcohol.”

    Me: “Okay–”

    RA: “Scott, get this man a beer!”

    The Lesson Is Always So Mechanical

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Movies & TV, Students, Technology

    (I heard this story secondhand from my brother. It takes place during his reading class. He watches a lot of movies and has a very sarcastic sense of humor.)

    Teacher: “What are some things that machines do better than people?”

    (Various answers are given, such as working out hard math problems and being hard to destroy.)

    Teacher: “What if machines one day became better at everything than humans?”

    Brother: *raspy voice* “When the machines rose up, we were defenseless against them.”

    (This is typically a very boring class, and even a stupid joke is bound to send everyone, including the teacher, into hysterics.)

    Brother: *raspy voice* “You must protect John Connor!”

    The Tiring History Of Lesson Planning

    | NV, USA | Bad Behavior, History

    (It’s the first week of classes. My best friend and I are in our last semester and have just met up for lunch.)

    Friend: “It was too soon for classes to start back up. I’m so tired.”

    Me: “Me, too! I went to sleep at 8 last night, and then woke up at 8:30, and decided not to go to my 9:30 class, so I slept in until 10.”

    Friend: “Seriously? I can’t believe you did that!”

    Me: “I was just really tired.”

    Friend: “It’s the first week of classes and you’re already missing one?”

    Me: “I know; it was bad.”

    Friend: “Which class was it? Was it the history class?”

    Me: “Yeah.”

    Friend: “That’s okay, then. Nobody cares about history.”

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