• A Very Long Engagement
    (607 thumbs up)
  • October's Theme Of The Month: Literally Illiterate!

    Category: Students

    Delayed Reaction To The Delayed Start

    | Boston, MA, USA | Students

    (We’re in class and the bell’s about to ring.)

    Teacher: “Before you go just remember that we have a delayed start on Monday. There are a lot of meetings so you can come in at 9:30.”

    Student #1: “Wait, which day?”

    Teacher: “Monday.”

    Student #2: “Why do we get a delayed start?”

    Teacher: “…There’s a lot of meetings.”

    Student #3: “Wait, what time do we come in?”

    Teacher: *visibly annoyed* “For everyone who didn’t hear. There will be a delayed start on Monday. School starts at 9:30. It is because there are meetings. Everybody got it?”

    Student #4: “Wait, what?”

    (Me, laughing hysterically.)

    A Funny Winter Is Coming

    | WI, USA | Holidays, Students

    (It’s the first day of school, and I’m wearing an outfit I bought in January. This story takes place with two teachers who can’t stand each other and constantly scold each other.)

    Teacher #1: *looks at me and bursts out laughing*

    Teacher #2: “Mr. [Teacher #1]! How dare you make fun of students!”

    Teacher #1: “LOOK at her! [My Name]! Hold up! Can you turn around so Ms.[Teacher #2], can get the bug out of her butt and see that I’m not making fun of you?”

    Me: *turning around*

    Teacher #2: “Well… uh… just remember to stop making fun of students!”

    (The reason for the laughter? I was wearing a shirt that said “Is it summer vacation yet?” on the first day of school.)

    And The West Coast Requires AC

    | USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Students

    (I am in an Intro to Engineering class; it is the first day of school.)

    Teacher: *calls on student* “What is the difference between AC and DC?”

    Student: *not playing attention* “Huh? Uh… DC’s on the east coast?”

    Reality Shark-Bites

    | Doncaster, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Students

    (We are in geography class and we are talking about oceans. One of my classmates says something unexpected.)

    Classmate: *puts her hand up and our teacher calls on her* “Sir, are sharks real?”

    Teacher: “Excuse me?”

    Classmate: “Are sharks real? Because I have never seen one in real life.”

    The Lesson Is Always So Mechanical

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Movies & TV, Students, Technology

    (I heard this story secondhand from my brother. It takes place during his reading class. He watches a lot of movies and has a very sarcastic sense of humor.)

    Teacher: “What are some things that machines do better than people?”

    (Various answers are given, such as working out hard math problems and being hard to destroy.)

    Teacher: “What if machines one day became better at everything than humans?”

    Brother: *raspy voice* “When the machines rose up, we were defenseless against them.”

    (This is typically a very boring class, and even a stupid joke is bound to send everyone, including the teacher, into hysterics.)

    Brother: *raspy voice* “You must protect John Connor!”

    Page 1/27112345...Last