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  • Category: Extra Stupid

    Should Have Read Up On It First

    | Brattleboro, VT, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Students

    (In my freshman year I have a social studies teacher who has us play Pictionary to memorize vocabulary words. One student, the troublemaker, is lying on the floor and refusing to participate.)

    Troublemaker: “I can’t play this.”

    Teacher: “Why not? Do you need to go to the nurse?”

    Troublemaker: “Yes!”

    Teacher: “May I ask why?”

    Troublemaker: “I’m dyslexic.”

    Teacher: “[Troublemaker], you don’t even know what dyslexia is.”

    Troublemaker: “MY DYSLEXIA HURTS!”

    (The troublemaker proceeds to storm out of the room.)

    Me: “Dyslexia doesn’t hurt.”

    Teacher: “I know. Also, how does it prevent you from playing Pictionary?”

    Citations Needed

    | NJ, USA | Cheaters, Extra Stupid, Lazy/Unhelpful, Students, Theme Of The Month

    (In one of my math classes, we have a final group paper to do. I’m the leader and ask the others to send me their parts so I can compile and edit them. Three of us are juniors and the third is a senior.)

    Me: “Okay, the paper is due in a week and a half. Can you send me your sections before next week so I have time to edit?”

    Three Group Members: “Sure!”

    (Two days later:)

    Two Juniors: “Here’s mine. Sorry it took so long.”

    (Two days later:)

    Me: “[Senior], did you finish yet? I really want the time to edit it. Yours is the last I need and I need to make sure everything flows okay.”

    (The next day:)

    Senior: “Oh, um, here it is.”

    (He sent me a copied Wikipedia page of his topic, complete with the embedded links!)

    Need To Make Some ‘Changes’

    | CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Students, Theme Of The Month

    (I have an oversized bag with a Rolling Stone cover of Johnny Depp. As I’m leaving class one day I overhear two girls discussing my bag.)

    Girl #1: “Look, her bag is Tupac. He’s so sexy. Too bad he died.”

    (Girl #2 readily agrees, and they continually discuss how sexy my ‘Tupac’ bag is. I can’t take it anymore because my bag clearly says ‘JOHNNY DEPP’ on it, so I tell said girls:)

    Me: “Um, my bag is Johnny Depp. Not Tupac.”

    (They then walked away discussing how sexy Johnny Depp is. If these two girls can’t tell the difference between two VERY different men, how the heck did they get into school?!)

    Common Sense Having An Off Season

    | CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Students, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s in the middle of June, and my last day at my student job before I leave to study in Germany for a year. Technically, my shift is over, but I’m waiting for my coworkers to end their shift and close up, as it’s likely the last time I will see them.)

    Coworker #1: “So, like, Germany is in the Eastern hemisphere, right?”

    Me: “Yup, that’s right. Nine hours ahead of California.”

    Coworker #1: “So, if you’re in a different hemisphere, that means, when you arrive, it’ll be winter there, right?”

    Me: “…seriously? Both Germany and California are in the Northern Hemisphere. The clock changes, not the season.” *looking to [Coworker #2]* “Did he really just ask me that?”

    Coworker #2: “I’m pretty sure he’s right. You’re changing hemispheres; you’ll want to be sure to pack winter clothes.”

    Me: “I will. I’m going for a year, but… You know what? Never mind. I’m just going to go home now. Good luck on your graduations next year…”

    Can’t Follow The Paper Trail

    | CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Students, Technology

    (I work as a lab supervisor in a small private college. My lab has about 80 computers split into four rooms sharing two printers. Many students there are very computer-challenged.)

    Student: ”My paper didn’t print.”

    Me: ”Which printer?”

    (The student names the printer so I direct her to the room its in. Thirty seconds later the student returns.)

    Student: ”It’s not there. The printer says it’s out of paper but I don’t think that’s the problem.”

    Me: ”Let’s take some paper just in case.”

    (It was out of paper.)

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